I am being hounded this week.
I have been “slightly” harassed on Facebook, by some young women wanting more recipes on here. Well one wants more recipes, one wants to be fed. I am working this week, but I promise I will start posting more. I have been working on my blog this week, just not posting.
I have known for a while I needed to go back to the beginning and edit. When I first started writing it was like a flood gate had been opened and the words poured out. I had no punctuation, no paragraphs, no flow, it was all just jumbled together. I am going back and fixing it.
Last week I also decided to add the lyrics to the songs I use for titles. Believe it or not, I actually look up each song, some I have stuck in my head that day as I start to write, some I google and go through songs until I find “the lyrics”. The lyrics which scream to me “Hey Kelly, we know what you are talking about, we hate whores, know a crazy bitch, or have hated men too!! Pick me!!” I always know as soon as I read a song if it’s a keeper or not. Sometimes my friends and family send me one they think I need to use.
Little fun fact about my blog? My first post “Stacy’s Mom”? It started the whole “soundtrack’ of my blog, and wasn’t my idea. A friend of mine (who I adore, and in the early months refused to ever give up on me, or my marriage. Who made me laugh through tears, and gave my self-esteem boosts by being my cheerleader) sent me a text when he found out I was going to write a blog and said “If the first post isn’t titled ‘Stacy’s Mom” I’m going to be disappointed, because the commercial with that song playing is U…” He didn’t know he was going to change the whole blog, and if we are being honest? He changed music for me, made it speak to me.
Before writing this blog, I had stopped listening to music, because it flipping hurt. It made me sad and mad, it made me want to scream. After I started writing? It became another outlet for the anger and sadness, it has helped me heal.
If you have ever wondered “Why the Hell does she have the song “Wake Me Up” by Avicii by itself on her blog? Why was that song singled out?”
Because I have cried to that song, I have screamed along with that song, and it was played on the radio the night I drove back from the store. You all know the night…the night of the bridge. That night I cried as I pulled off the highway for my turn, listening to the song. I was trying to ‘carry the weight of the world’.
So whole reason for this post? I might not be posting new stuff because I am editing, and adding to past posts this week. If you get bored, go check them out.
Next week I will add a new recipe, pinky swear…
“I see the questions in your eyes
I know what’s weighing on your mind
But you can be sure I know my part
‘Cause I’ll stand beside you through the years
You’ll only cry those happy tears
And though I’ll make mistakes
I’ll never break your heart
-John Michael Montgomery-