People use searches to find my blog.
Some type the title “Happiness used to live here…surviving an affair” some use the address “cancanwhoreaffair.wordpress.com” to find me. I won’t lie I got a certain satisfaction the day I typed in ‘cancanwhoreaffair’.
Funny thing is I didn’t really know anyone would see it, or notice it I just did it for myself. I started the blog months before I really entered a word for a post , and when I came back to it later I kept it because to me funny is funny, no matter how bitter.
At that time I didn’t know anything about searches or stats on a blog, I didn’t discover them until round two with wordpress and writing. For you non-bloggers let me explain a little about stats…
My blog has stats that are gathered everyday, and they let me know a little about my audience. I know how many visitors I get daily, how many posts they are reading, what posts they are reading, where they are from, and how they find me.
Some people find me by reading other blogs, these bloggers might give me a shout out or a referral…like “Hey if you like reading crazy? I have a site for you to check out!!”
Sometimes they find me by a comment I make on another blog “I hate whores too!!” or something actually helpful I might say in a comment.
Another way people find my blog is by doing a search on the computer. I get to see what search terms you all use to find me, and these are sometimes funny.
“Shit that sucks my husbands affair” this search made me realize maybe I use the words shit and sucks way too much in my blog.
“Used up whore“? Come on I don’t need to explain why this search made me chuckle.
“I got a whore for christmas” ummm? You and my husband both.
“Bitch sent me fb inbox to stay away from her man” Hmm… I’d personally like to give said ‘bitch’ a high-five, and tell you to stay away from her man.
“What makes you a town whore” HA!! Is all I have to say to anyone who doesn’t think my blog is educational. I know I answered this person’s question.
“How do you sugar coat your a slut” You don’t, please just say it.
“Why did the bitch sleep with my man when she knew he had a family” Because she’s a whore, would have been my response to this search.
” Assholehusbands” I’m sure they found a paragraph or two about asshole husbands on here too.
I also have every type of search for Can Can Whore known to man in my search stats…Valdez Cancan whore, can can whore blog, happiness use to live here cancan.wearing.whore, cancanwhoreaffair, cancanwhore, cancanwhoreaffiar, can can whore affair, cancanwhoreaffair.wordpress, etc… but my favorite of all time?
“The Can Can Whore of Valdez” it’s so official and almost like a title? Instead of Mrs. or Ms. Valdez like a pageant title, it’s a crown and sash for being the official Can Can Whore of Valdez.
If I could just get that contest added to the upcoming Gold Rush Days. They officially crown her, she could wear her costume, shake her fat ass, it would be a great night, the crowds screaming “Can Can Whore, Can Can Whore!!” as she does a lap around the stage lifting her skirt to give everyone a glimpse of those famous thighs…sigh, sorry I’m off subject.
How people find my blog has always amazed me, but over the last couple days new searches keep popping up. “cancanwhore who writes”, “who writes cancanwhoreaffair blog”, and “cancanwhore blogger”.
Now I could ignore the searches, but we all know how I am. I am a direct, get to the point, pull the band-aid off type of girl. So I am going to ask,
WTF do you want to know? I write an open blog, I use my real first name, I refer to the state I live in a lot, I don’t try and hide.
What Do You Want To Know About Me? I gave you all a picture, and yes it’s a picture of me.
Do you want my physical address and social security number?
Did I win “Blogger Of The Year” and you want to send me a prize?
Do you need to know my last name so you can stalk me?
“What Do You Want?”
Let’s get a few things clear…
I don’t use my last name because my kids deserve privacy.
My husband deserves privacy.
Even The Whore deserves privacy.
I don’t want them to be stalked and contacted, this is my story, so I only use my name.
I have been as open and honest on here as I feel I can be without hurting all the other people in my story.
If there is something else you have to know about me? Ask me, that’s why there is a comment box at the bottom of my blog.
But if you continue to use every version of “Who writes the can can whore affair blog?” to find me? You are going to keep just finding my posts,not my name and address and kind of pissing me off.
FYI, I’m not that exciting.
I’m not that special.
I just write a blog while raising kids, puppies, cows and some hogs.
“Yawn…” I’m now boring myself.
So please, either be happy just reading what I write, or “Fuck off!!”
You are creeping me out…
Thanks in advance,
Kelly the writer of the Can Can Whore Blog
Tell me who’s watching
Who’s watching me?
I’m just an average man, with an average life
I work from nine to five; hey hell, I pay the price
All I want is to be left alone in my average home
But why do I always feel like I’m in the Twilight Zone, and
I always feel like somebody’s watching me
And I have no privacy
Woh, I always feel like somebody’s watching me
Tell me is it just a dream?
When I come home at night
I bolt the door real tight
People call me on the phone I’m trying to avoid
Well, can the people on TV see me
Or am I just paranoid?”