Sweet Dreams

Oh my…

I didn’t know the controversy over the book.

The one I’m not going to name.

I think when you find yourself with a cheating husband or wife in today’s world, we all turn towards the internet. If you can’t find answers by googling then you can’t find them anywhere. I myself started googling as soon as I found out. Hell if I’m being honest, I was googling my husband’s behavior long before I found out…like two years before.

I asked him when he first started texting the whore if he was having an affair. I have spent an ungodly amount of time wondering, what would have happened if he would have told me straight up

“Hey Kelly I’m talking to a whore at work.”

Me being me, I would have found her on the internet, pulled up her endless selfies, her constant need of attention, her lip puckering pic, and told him flat-out (after I finished crying from the laughter)…

“Have you lost your mind? If that’s what you want? Please don’t let the door hit you on your way out.”

Instead of having a two-year affair, he would have had a month of texting a whore, because I believe he would have started seeing her in the real light, not the make-believe fog of an affair. And if it would have taken him more time than that? I would have been free to move on with Mr. Clooney, and I would now be the one engaged to him.

Don’t laugh at me, at one time he was 10 minutes from where I sit typing this today. He lived 15 minutes from me for months, and the only reason we didn’t fall in love (besides his ‘security detail’) was because my husband lied to me and said “No”.

“I’m so sorry George, sorry you will never meet me, sorry you will never laugh with me, sorry I can’t save you from being a bachelor forever. From the bottom of my heart I am sorry…” Sigh…

So where was I? Oh yeah infidelity and the ol’search engine. One of the first things we all find is a book, which claims we can turn this around and make our cheating spouses’ cheating into the best thing ever to happen to us. My husband bought me said book, and I read it in 24 hours. When I was done my husband asked…

“So, was it any good? Did it help?”

To answer his question and since I know a bunch of you are dying to know my opinion…

“Yes it helped”

Now let me explain.

It helped me feel not so alone. It helped me be thankful that my husband never when faced with a choice walked away from me. It helped me see there are bigger assholes than my husband. It helped me see stupid and whores often walk hand in hand. It helped me decide I will never change ME to keep my husband. It helped me see bad shit happens everywhere. It helped me see a marriage can survive an affair. It helped me help my kids. It helped me.

The first ‘blogger’ I found in my search also helped me. She gave me a name for triggers. She put a voice to the sorrow I was feeling. She put my feelings into words and made me not feel so stinking alone.

I hear I have done the same for some of you my readers. I’m glad I could pay it forward.

Maybe someday there will be a book out there by me. I can only imagine the mixed feelings over it. I know the ‘mixed’ feelings over just my blog. If I ever was to write a book, I’d have to get a lot thicker skin.

I don’t know if anyone would ever read it.

I used to think the same of my blog.

I do know where I’d start my book tour at 😉

And the picture I’d put on the cover 🙂

Hey, a girl has to dream.

“Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree
I travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody’s looking for something

Hold your head up, keep your head up, movin’ on
Hold your head up, movin’ on, keep your head up, movin’ on
Hold your head up, movin’ on, keep your head up, movin’ on
Hold your head up, movin’ on, keep your head up

Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused”

-Eurythmics-

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4 Responses to Sweet Dreams

  1. brokenjoan says:

    AHHHH, dreams where would we be without them? I to have dreams, I dream my husband wasn’t a cheating asshole, I dream his whore gets a raging burning std, but most of all I dream I’m in a nightmare right now, but I’ll be waking up soon! A girl can dream can’t she, even when her dream is completely different, although I did enjoy your fantasy about George! You always give me something to smile about, Kelly!😋

    • I like to think of it as my alternate reality 🙂 in it Kelly is happily living in Hollywood. George often tells me how lucky he is to have me in his life, how long he spent searching for someone to complete him…Yes, he used the words “You complete me Kelly” when he asked me to marry him…sigh

  2. horsesrcumin says:

    Geez. Another thing your husband fucked up for you, Kelly 😉 ! Damn him.

  3. Lette says:

    Love this post. I really needed a laugh tonight!

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