Cry Me A River

Last week was hard.

It is stinking hard to accept the things you can not change.

Especially when you are having a pity party for one.

My pity party is over, who wants to be around a whiny person?

Not me…my husband once liked a whiny whore, but he even got tired of all the whining.

I don’t do whining.

Don’t allow it in my kids.

Don’t allow it in my life.

So I promise, no more…because when you whine? Often God gives you something to whine about. I get it, I do. So my whining about not getting to celebrate my being a good wife, a faithful wife, keeping my vows, fighting for my marriage? I’m done with it.

Boo Fucking Who, Kelly, cry me a river…

Husbands die…

Kids die…

People get sick…

People lose everything…

You have a messed up marriage, a husband who cheated, a whore who tried to ruin your life? So flipping what…I mean really? So what?

You have your health.

You have healthy kids.

You have a husband who is alive and fighting to keep you.

You have exceptional people in your life who love YOU.

So send the band home, take down the streamers, sweep up the confetti and dry your tears…

Pity party for one is over.

“Now you say you’re lonely
You cried the long night through
Well, you can cry me a river, cry me a river
I cried a river over you

Now you say you’re sorry
For being so untrue
Well, you can cry me a river, cry me a river
I cried, a river over you

You drove me, nearly drove me, out of my head
While you never shed a tear
Remember, I remember, all that you said”

-Ella Fitzgerald-




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10 Responses to Cry Me A River

  1. Dang sometimes it’s hard to get over that pity party. I remember reading I mean way early on in recovery like month 1 I guess and the author Cindy Beal was like So What? Her husband was a worship leader and had multiple affairs and got one pregnant.
    and this woman was telling me So What?

    I threw the dam book across the room..
    Yup.. I did. .
    But you are right comes a time..

  2. brokenjoan says:

    Love the song, I just don’t think the time will ever come for me when I can truthfully say that I am over my husband cheating on me, if that makes me a whiny, unforgiving bitch, so be it, he made me this way!

    • Joan I’m not over it…I will never be over it. But I’m over whining about my twentieth anniversary…I’m over my pity party…I’m over giving in to the sadness…at least for now.

      I just have to refocus on what I have, not what I can never get back.

      Hugs my sweet not so bitter or broken friend šŸ™‚

  3. pabloswife says:

    Love ya Miss Kelly ā¤

  4. Slim says:

    Hi Kelly, I have only commented once on another blog, so usually, I am just a betrayed bystander. I’m commenting today because I like your attitude of trying to defeat this and not be defeated, (despite it being one of the hardest things one may ever face.) As a betrayed spouse, we find ourselves saying to others “you will never know the impact of an affair until you go through it? And “That people don’t don’t understand unless they have been there”. Well I actually think once you go through this type of betrayal WE are the ones who no longer relate to ANYONE else. We lose sight that there is life going on with or without us. A situation is never black and white, but if you are on the outside looking in, it actually is…so I am trying to desperately to see my life from an outside view and forget all about the gray blurry lines that complicate life and divide me from everyone else. … I’m glad our marriage was saved, I’m not not so happy with what it took to make it happen but nonetheless my next 18 years of marriage look better than the previous,(that is if I choose it to be). šŸ˜‰

    • I get what you are saying, we see things differently after the betrayal and have a hard time not seeing the affair wherever we look. It’s true, so sad but true.

      I guess I’m just too stubborn to let this define my life. I won’t let the actions of others make me into a person I don’t like.

      Thanks for commenting and reading, always happy to hear someone is listening to my rants šŸ˜‰

      • Slim says:

        You say you’re Stubborn, I knew there was something about me I liked about you, lol.
        Everyone’s path is different but most of us have the same destination.. . Happiness. So Happy journey Kelly, I am rooting for you.
        And unfortunately I’m pretty sure there are plenty more readers like me “quietly” listening to your rants.

  5. Youwillneverbeme says:

    šŸ™‚ I was listening to a song that I thought you might like I don’t know if u have heard it but you can find the video on you tube , sometimes when I feel like giving up I listen to it . Ben howard – keep your head up. Thank you for your reply to my message it means a lot . xx

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