D-day is approaching.
It makes me a little angry and sad.
Not totally flipping out crazy anymore, just a little angry and sad.
Hey, that is progress.
My life has been extremely busy, I think that helps me not dwell and immerse myself in the anniversary of the worst day in my life.
I feel God testing me lately, maybe smacking me, because he knows how I am.
My blog and my personal life, were attacked publicly a couple weeks ago. I was told I can’t preach kindness and non judgment in life if I continue to write this blog.
I guess people in my small town think I’m crazy 🙂 for writing about my life.
There is a group of people whom I guess have nothing better to do but read my blog and then discuss how awful I am.
I must need more Jesus in my life.
Those words she uses?
The stories she tells?
Oh my gosh she’s going to Hell!!
As they talk and make their comments about me, on Facebook.
People who have never set foot in my house.
Have never set at my kitchen counter.
Never had more than a fifteen minute conversation with me.
Who then received messages on their wall congratulating them on putting me in my place?
Thier talk of me, Kelly, acting as if I’m perfect.
I stopped, took a big breath, calmly sat down with a smile.
Then I thanked God for showing me how much I’d grown and how far I’ve come.
Three years ago, they would have brought me to my knees.
Two years ago, I would have called them out.
Instead I laughed.
I don’t care.
I started writing to heal.
To not feel so alone.
To convince myself I wasn’t crazy.
It has helped to heal me.
I have helped others along the way.
And at some point, I stopped worrying about being crazy and embraced it instead.
I think others would be so much happier if they could make peace with thier own crazy too.
Instead they will spend thier days throwing stones at people like me.
My arm would get way too tired to live like that.
So instead I’ll just sit over here with Angry Kelly, Crazy Kelly, and Sad Kelly.
Bob made popcorn for us 🙂
We’re just going to sit back and watch the rerun of people making a show of calling me out.
“Haven’t we seen this episode before?” Crazy Kelly takes a handful of popcorn.
“Sshh, they mentioned me by name!!” Angry Kelly does a fist pump.
“Bahahaha!! I love this episode!!!” Sad Kelly holds her stomach as tears roll down her face from laughter.
Bob quietly holds out his hand and my fist meets his in a fist bump.
“Seems like there’s always someone who disapproves
They’ll judge it like they know about me and you
And the verdict comes from those with nothing else to do
The jury’s out, but my choice is you
So don’t you worry your pretty little mind
People throw rocks at things that shine
And life makes love look hard
The stakes are high, the water’s rough
But this love is ours”